Why I Dance in My Bathrobe Every Morning

Three simple ways to calm your nervous system in perimenopause

This morning, before I looked at a single screen, I stepped outside in my bathrobe, put on Weezer's cover of "Africa," on my headphones and danced in the early light.

Just a Gen X perimenopausal mama, winter hat, robe flapping, listening and honoring how my body wants to move. 

It might look like silliness. It is also one of the most potent things I do to support my hormones and nervous system all day. Let me tell you why.

Why perimenopause makes us more sensitive to stress

In perimenopause, our hormones don't decline in a neat, steady line. They rise and fall unpredictably, sometimes from one day to the next.

Progesterone is often one of the first to drop. Along with its other jobs, it has a naturally calming effect on the brain and helps us sleep. As it declines and estrogen swings, many women find they're more easily rattled, more anxious, and sleeping less deeply than they used to.

At the same time, this is often the most demanding season of our lives. I think of it as being surrounded by tiny tigers: children, aging parents, work, homes to tend, friendships to keep up, and a world that feels more chaotic every time we open our phones. One tiger doesn't leave before the next one bites.

So we become more susceptible to internal chaos at exactly the moment the world outside feels most chaotic.

In my work as a pelvic health practitioner, I see where that stress lands. When the nervous system stays in fight or flight, the pelvic bowl braces. That bracing can show up as urgency, leaking, pelvic pain and painful intimacy. Calming the nervous system isn't separate from pelvic healing. It's the foundation of it.

Which brings me back to my bathrobe.

1. Morning light sets our body clock

Getting natural light into your eyes soon after waking is one of the simplest, most powerful ways to support your hormones.

Morning light tells your internal clock that the day has begun. It helps your cortisol rise when it should, in the morning, so you feel alert. It also sets the timer for melatonin to rise in the evening, so you feel sleepy at night. When those rhythms are steady, sleep improves, and good sleep is one of the best things we can give a perimenopausal nervous system.

You don't need a sunrise or a clear sky. Even on a cloudy day, outdoor light is far brighter than indoor light. Aim for 5 to 10 minutes outside within the first hour of waking, ideally before you look at your phone.

I like to think of it this way: if the moon is an embodiment of feminine energy, let the sun be the most reliable, steady expression of masculine energy. Let yourself be in relationship with it.

2. Music and dancing release feel-good hormones

When you move to music you love, your body releases feel-good hormones like dopamine and endorphins. It lifts your mood and helps take the edge off the stress of being pulled in a hundred directions.

Movement also gives your body a way to discharge stress rather than store it. Animals shake after a threat passes. We can too. A few minutes of dancing, shaking or stomping each day is a kind of embodied hygiene, just like brushing your teeth.

It doesn't have to be graceful, and it doesn't have to be long. One song is enough.

3. The bathrobe is essential

I'm only half joking.

The bathrobe is a clear expression of the liberation so many of us find as our estrogen, and our f*cks left to give, decline. It says: I'm not performing this for anyone. I'm not waiting until I look a certain way to feel good in my body.

So many of us carry shame as we age, some of it self-inflicted and much of it handed to us by a culture that doesn't value older women. Dancing in your bathrobe, in full view of the neighbors if need be, is a small act of claiming ourselves in this moment. Perimenopause is a transformational time, and a rite of passage to experience, not a condition to be managed.

Try it tomorrow morning

1. Before you pick up your phone, step outside, or stand by an open door or window.
2. Put on one song you love.
3. Let your body move however it wants: sway, shake, stomp, dance.
4. When the song ends, stand still for a few breaths and notice how you feel.

Bathrobe optional. But highly recommended.

These practices support your wellbeing and aren't a substitute for medical care. If you're struggling with sleep, mood or pelvic symptoms, please reach out to a provider you trust.

Want more practices like this?

I've put together a free somatic guide with three simple practices to bring your nervous system out of fight or flight, so your body, and your pelvis, can finally soften.

Get the free guide here →

And if you're ready for one-on-one support with pelvic pain, leaking or the changes of perimenopause, I'd love to hear your story. Book a free clarity call.

With love,

Chaya Leia Aronson, RN, BSN

Your Sacred Pelvis